High Def. Resolutions

Its the first Saturday of the year and it seems that only after three days of making up a resolution I am bound to disengage from all the promises I have made.

First stop, the thank-you-for-not-smoking predicament that has been forever clinging upon my back is now getting the best of me.  After ending my year with a bang that was pretty heavily induced with toxins that  knocked me out cold, I decided to put a halt to my cancerous rampage.  I know its such a lie to say that i have stopped cause you have heard it from me for the nth time already, but this one is different.  I am TRYING!

The second thing is that, 2008 was the year of parties galore.  I have never been to so many night frolics in my life like what this moment of history has given to me.  2009 will put an end to all these futile grasps for something real.  I think I am happier staying at home than spending money on entrances and liqour.  But the thing is, I have three group of friends asking me out tonight, how can I say no?  How can I leave my former life behind just like that?  Should I say hi to my dvd player again?

No more liquor.  Imagine being greeted as “palahubog” every time you enter the front doors of the office by the company guard.  Imagine, it wouldn’t be more perfect of a picture than reality itself.  I’ve been sober for the last couple of months now and I intend to keep it that way (sober meaning free from alcohol everyday).

By learning to say no, i will make myself invincible from all the hurt and pain that will come.  The word yes is synonymous to being vulnerable to the point of self destruction.  This, mind you, only applies to the Ex-Mehn.  So, no.

Since I am going to make a lawyer out of my genius self, ehem, i am in dire need of cash.  A lot measures have been taken upon but to no avail, I still am in an impoverished situation.  Well, not exactly poor, what I mean is that my bank account is bone dry when it comes to my standards.  I have enough money to live off in a year  excluding the vices but including the shopping, not unless I will spend it on that not on my education.  Anywho, yes, for this year, I will be poor to save up more on scholastic reasons and for a long term goal.  Hello hermit is that yer?

So far, since I have begun to write this entry, I’ve had 3 phone calls and 10 messages from friends urging me to go out and enjoy life tonight.  This will be a battle of wits and self-control.  If I go out tonight, all those resolutions above will be compromised and if I don’t, well, it will be time for me to find out that there are better things to do on a Saturday evening than just being out to party.

It is not that I a totally shunning away from my friends, its just that there are moments in our lives that we have to make some choices to better ourselves or just plunge right through the abyss of self-immolation just because you chose to go a different path.

The church bell just rang for 6pm, I still have 2 more hours to sleep this through and to wake up with my decision.  Its either to wake up all night drinking booze and smoking around or sleep in my comfy bed.